Sunday, December 21, 2008

quiet celebration

I'm not out celebrating the winter solstice tonight.

I've been down at Toronto's Kensington Market Festival of Lights the last couple of years. But an abrupt, intense sore throat, waking me late Wednesday night, signalled an attack on my body. While I did not have to work on Thursday, I had a busy day planned. I tried... I tried to get things done. But I couldn't even sit at my desk. I couldn't sit upright. Back to bed I went and slept most of the day. Crazy fevered psycho never-ending spiralling daymares tortured me. I waited until the evening before taking sedative drugs and finally rested. 24 hours completely lost. Friday, as the storms moved in, I slinked off to work fighting intense headaches, sweating, and trying to conserve energy. I made one critical shopping stop on the way home and deferred everything that I could.

This unbridled bug messed up my whole weekend. I cancelled all my appointments and buckled down to complete all my work related commitments. I finished a few hours ago. I can finally relax.

I'm still not well. It feels like I've have half-swallowed a strand of yarn, part of it down my throat, part of it caught in my mouth. A most disquieting feeling. I miss seeing everyone but I really need to be careful. If I partied hard tonight I could mess up the rest of the week off!

So, I sit at home, glancing out the window, across snow laden fences to dark amber clouds reflecting city lights thinking about the stars beyond and our Sun as it begins it's long journey out of the depth of night.

I'm going to light lots of candles now to chase away the darkness.

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